Every day I ask myself - what can I do to help change the atrocities in the world? Can one person really make a difference? The immediate solution for me is to use my network to create awareness (which I try to work on a little every day). One of the solutions I strongly believe in is microcredit, which led me to this awesome video!
As the Interface Foundation looks to help high impact foundations eliminate gender disparity in primary and secondary education by 2009 and in all levels of education no later than 2015 this video shows the powerful social and economic change brought about when girls have the opportunity to participate in their society.
Showing posts with label 30 reasons to not marry before 30. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 30 reasons to not marry before 30. Show all posts
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Sunday, August 9, 2009
MTV's Engaged & Underage
As my friends know, I don't watch TV. There are many reasons for this, one of which is the fact that 99% of it crap.
Case in point... MTV's show, Engaged and Underage. Why are we enamored with the drama of others? This is a sad state of affairs...
Need I say more?
Ready for more misery? MTV lets you watch full episodes at
http://www.mtv.com/shows/engaged_and_underage/video.jhtml?filter=fulleps
Case in point... MTV's show, Engaged and Underage. Why are we enamored with the drama of others? This is a sad state of affairs...
Need I say more?
Ready for more misery? MTV lets you watch full episodes at
http://www.mtv.com/shows/engaged_and_underage/video.jhtml?filter=fulleps
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Keys to a Successful Marriage?
We've received over 350 responses from our survey participants on the "Keys to a Successful Marriage". The number one comment was, of course, communication, followed closely by love, trust, respect, loyalty, self-worth, respect, flexibility, common goals, appreciation, patience, humor, forgiveness, friendship, honesty, understanding, and... sex. Below are a few perspectives from our readers, followed by a recent Australian Study on the topic...Female, 36, New York, Relationship
- Continuing to take responsibility for my own personal happiness. My problems are my own to confront and resolve. I believe my husband will be there to support and encourage me, but ultimately the choices I make and the attitude I choose come from within.
- Learning how to communicate and problem solve together. Relationships are the means by which personal issues present themselves. In a successful marriage, couples are wiling to bring up and talk about issues and problems, and put their heads together to work out a solution. The skill of learning how to talk about problems in a way that is constructive is a huge asset.
- Being an excellent team-mate, especially when the going gets tough. In a successful marriages, spouses are each other's best cheerleader, coach, mentor, protégé, friend, partner no matter what and they take turns playing these roles.
- Communication - in a way that your partner will understand. Men and women talk differently, and if I woman wants her husband to understand her needs then she needs to present them in a way that he's going to be able to grasp.
- Giving to your partner even when you don't want to. Betterment of the relationship should be the goal.
- Understanding that both people show their love in different ways, and finding a comprimise that will ensure both partners are happy with it.
Female, 45, San Diego, Married
- Never keep secerts from each other.
- Whatever happens in your bedroom is no one elses busniess but yours. That means best friends also.
- When ever you have a disagreement with your spouse, that is between you both. When you are ready to forgeive often times your friends and family are not. Or may never forgive.
A recent study from Australian National University, entitled "What's Love Got to Do With It," tracked nearly 2,500 couples -- married or living together -- from 2001 to 2007 to identify factors associated with those who remained together compared with those who divorced or separated.
- It found that a husband who is nine or more years older than his wife is twice as likely to get divorced, as are husbands who get married before they turn 25.
- Children also influence the longevity of a marriage or relationship, with one-fifth of couples who have kids before marriage -- either from a previous relationship or in the same relationship -- having separated compared to just nine percent of couples without children born before marriage.
- Women who want children much more than their partners are also more likely to get a divorce.
- A couple's parents also have a role to play in their own relationship, with the study showing some 16 percent of men and women whose parents ever separated or divorced experienced marital separation themselves compared to 10 percent for those whose parents did not separate.
- Also, partners who are on their second or third marriage are 90 percent more likely to separate than spouses who are both in their first marriage. ALL THE MORE REASON TO WAIT AND GET IT RIGHT THE FIRST TIME!!!!
Sunday, February 8, 2009
book summary
30 Reasons NOT to Marry before 30, written by male and female co-authors, endorses the growing trend and benefits of delaying marriage. It gives women 30 reasons to disavow the mounting pressure they feel about finding a marriage partner as they approach and turn 30. These 30 reasons provide practical advice, a humorous set of examples and insights from participants aged 21-71.
Introduction
This book is in no way against marriage. It is rather an opportunity to encourage those in their twenties to reach maturity before making “the big decision” and to advise the never married women in their thirties that they are the “smart ones” (despite the media’s portrayal). We tell the real stories of those that took the plunge too soon, and those that wish to share sacred keys that open the doors to a ‘successful’ marriage.
We’ve both spent a good deal of time in the self help section of the book store. We are consistently amazed at how much literature is devoted to helping a woman achieve success at what is supposed to be her ultimate goal: the altar. Marriage is all fine and well, but wait. Give yourself time. My god, you’re young, energetic, full of unfulfilled dreams, probably pretty well educated, and you want to close all of those open doors by signing a contract that commits you to someone else when you don’t even have your own life figured out?
Society Frowns but Trends Talk
At the beginning of the 20th century, the average U.S. life expectancy was at most in the mid 50s. Couples married young because there was a much narrower window in which to raise a family. By the time most children were grown, their parents were either sick or dead. Medical technology and guides to healthier living have changed that. You’re going to live a long, full life so don’t squander those extra years that dieticians, yoga, spas, and vaccines have given you by rushing to the altar: use your youth to explore, laugh, cry, travel, meet new people, pursue a career, or just plain old be who you want to be; off the clock, no strings attached; even a little irresponsible. In other words, indulge yourself at an age in your life when that is about all you’re really emotionally capable of. Don’t worry; the responsibilities, the contract obligations, the sacrifices . . . they’ll come (all too quickly), but before they do—get to know yourself; you might like what you find.
Better Odds in Vegas
So, what do you think your chances are of a lasting marriage if you wed at age 25? Well, 4 out of every 10 of you will divorce। That’s a pretty high risk factor. But, (and here’s the kicker) for every 5 years a woman waited to marry after the age of 26, the divorce rate dropped 50%! To put that in perspective, if you married between the ages of 35-39 your chances of a marriage ending in divorce decreased to 5%, or there’s a 95% chance your marriage will last. While the median marriage age has increased from 21 in 1960 to 26 in 2007, we still have a long way to go.
But, I Want To Have Babies
Fine, great… just don’t rush it! There’s really no need. For example, if you marry at 35, and your marriage is successful, you get to spend about 50 years with your spouse – that’s a heck of a long time! After a couple of years together, both of you are perfectly capable physiologically to begin raising a family. All studies which address this agree that babies born to 35-39 year old women come out just as happy and healthy as those born to younger age-groups. The studies, specifically the Apgar scores (method to quickly assess the health of newborn children), are practically screaming at you to enjoy your 20s while they’re there, because once they’re gone…well, you know the rest. The older the mother (even into her early 40s), the more mature she is psychologically and emotionally. She’s dealt with problems on her own, made decisions on her own, established a profession, developed a healthy self-awareness, learned to avoid the assholes of the world, and is surely more prepared to deal with the infinite myriad of tribulations about to descend upon her when she begins raising a child (children).
Introduction
This book is in no way against marriage. It is rather an opportunity to encourage those in their twenties to reach maturity before making “the big decision” and to advise the never married women in their thirties that they are the “smart ones” (despite the media’s portrayal). We tell the real stories of those that took the plunge too soon, and those that wish to share sacred keys that open the doors to a ‘successful’ marriage.
We’ve both spent a good deal of time in the self help section of the book store. We are consistently amazed at how much literature is devoted to helping a woman achieve success at what is supposed to be her ultimate goal: the altar. Marriage is all fine and well, but wait. Give yourself time. My god, you’re young, energetic, full of unfulfilled dreams, probably pretty well educated, and you want to close all of those open doors by signing a contract that commits you to someone else when you don’t even have your own life figured out?
Society Frowns but Trends Talk
At the beginning of the 20th century, the average U.S. life expectancy was at most in the mid 50s. Couples married young because there was a much narrower window in which to raise a family. By the time most children were grown, their parents were either sick or dead. Medical technology and guides to healthier living have changed that. You’re going to live a long, full life so don’t squander those extra years that dieticians, yoga, spas, and vaccines have given you by rushing to the altar: use your youth to explore, laugh, cry, travel, meet new people, pursue a career, or just plain old be who you want to be; off the clock, no strings attached; even a little irresponsible. In other words, indulge yourself at an age in your life when that is about all you’re really emotionally capable of. Don’t worry; the responsibilities, the contract obligations, the sacrifices . . . they’ll come (all too quickly), but before they do—get to know yourself; you might like what you find.
Better Odds in Vegas
So, what do you think your chances are of a lasting marriage if you wed at age 25? Well, 4 out of every 10 of you will divorce। That’s a pretty high risk factor. But, (and here’s the kicker) for every 5 years a woman waited to marry after the age of 26, the divorce rate dropped 50%! To put that in perspective, if you married between the ages of 35-39 your chances of a marriage ending in divorce decreased to 5%, or there’s a 95% chance your marriage will last. While the median marriage age has increased from 21 in 1960 to 26 in 2007, we still have a long way to go.
But, I Want To Have Babies
Fine, great… just don’t rush it! There’s really no need. For example, if you marry at 35, and your marriage is successful, you get to spend about 50 years with your spouse – that’s a heck of a long time! After a couple of years together, both of you are perfectly capable physiologically to begin raising a family. All studies which address this agree that babies born to 35-39 year old women come out just as happy and healthy as those born to younger age-groups. The studies, specifically the Apgar scores (method to quickly assess the health of newborn children), are practically screaming at you to enjoy your 20s while they’re there, because once they’re gone…well, you know the rest. The older the mother (even into her early 40s), the more mature she is psychologically and emotionally. She’s dealt with problems on her own, made decisions on her own, established a profession, developed a healthy self-awareness, learned to avoid the assholes of the world, and is surely more prepared to deal with the infinite myriad of tribulations about to descend upon her when she begins raising a child (children).
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